Tuesday, November 30, 2004
And We're Rolling...

The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, Fourth Edition defines better as:
More advantageous or favorable; improved

That about sums up how things are at this moment.

Better and better and better and better and better and better...

It's as though things are going exactly as planned. Bwaaahahaha!

Today I found myself on the phone in complete aw. Me pop rang me up just to thank me for getting together with him for Breakfast. First things first... = O After grasping the reality of the situation I was able to have a great conversation with him about how people have very little respect for our occupations of choice. It's all too true that it's a blessing and a curse to know how to repair cars and computers because nearly everyone has either or both. Ha! I had a chat with pop about work stress and it was a two way chat at that! Heeeheeeheee. = D

The iPod is rocking on! At present the total listening time is 6.1 days (2045 song). I've finally reached the M's. This'll take a while with Megadeth and Metallica in the mix. There are far too many albums from those gents. After that... yipes, the N's and P's. And yet I gl33. Gl33 gl33 gl33.


Hmmm... too much dust on the desk. I should do something about that tomorrow eve. Actually, too much stuff in general. Icky bills hovering around calling for my attention. = D One will go away foh'evah this week though. Lalala! Squeeee!

Alice, Emma and I found our way back to the dangerous place yesterday --- Woodbury Commons. I held off from spending money! LMAO! Riiiight. I was planning on purchasing this fine piece o-tech along with the iPod but waiting due to possible compatibility with the iPod photo. Fortune smiled upon the two devices so they're cooperating presently providing me with clean background music (by Anthrax presently). Ahh. It's so small and cute. Bose, what a company. It's not perfect but it does what it was designed to do - plays music with ultimate ease. I couldn't believe the instructions were so brief that they were printed on the inner folds of the packaging. Four lil'ol steps until... boom and crash went the drums. Quoting Strong Bad - "Very nice, very nice"

Ah, also on yesterday's agenda was Avenga's first Dinner Party. The result? I cry - success! Getting people to leave the city isn't easy. They seem to feel that anything outside the "city" is in the middle of nowhere. Of course this is ridiculous but they just can't help themselves down from their box. Stand down peeps, Avenga kicked your ass with her eggplant. Didn't see it coming did ya! Haaha. It was a good time to be had by pretty much everyone. Sadly a stomach and a brain were working on their owners a little more than expected for my shopping companions. Who's what was bothering who? Guess I'll be the only one of three to know this lil tid bit. La la la to you I say. Yes, la la la. Congrats Avenga! You did'd good.

Class has broken into scene work. It's as though we're mini-directing which is quite entertaining because both people are trying to figure out who will be the "director". Fortunately it has been fairly collaborative so far which is what I expected since it is scene work and not a show. THAT would be a different story altogether I think I think.

Since it's broken the 1AM hour I will put my brains into stand-by mode and let the rest of the world exist without me for a bit. Ganbatte world!

11-30-2004 01:03 am
Wednesday, November 24, 2004
We never stop working for you!

Pathetic.My experience with Verizon and Kyocera has been anything but helpful or even enjoyable lately.

Earlier this week I asked Kyocera:

"I wonder if there is any tentative release date set for the Kyocera Koi?/ KX2 Camera Phone to in the US market for Verizonwireless? Thanks for your feedback in advance."

Their reply on 11/23:

"Dear Gary Ploski,
Thank you for contacting Kyocera Wireless Corporation. We apologize for the inconvenience that you are experiencing in obtaining Kyocera Koi phone.

Kyocera Koi phone would be very soon available for purchase in the USA. However, we are unable to assist you with the release date information because we do not have any official confirmation of it. Please contact your desired Service Providers and visit our website at www.kyocera-wireless.com for further assistance.

If this response does not answer your question completely or if you have further questions, please contact us at the phone numbers listed below:
-Phone: (800) 349-4478 (Toll-free USA and Canada only)
-International Access: (858) 882-1401 (Outside the USA)
-Fax: (858) 882-1717
We appreciate your business.

Steffy Kahn,
Technical Support Specialist
Kyocera Wireless Corporation"

I wrote Verizon EARLY this morning asking:

"I am writing to you again with the hope that a personwill respond with an answer and not an automated response with standardanswers. I wrote to Kyocera the other day and was advised that "KyoceraKoi phone would be very soon available for purchase in the USA. However,we are unable to assist you with the release date information because wedo not have any official confirmation of it." The rep suggestd that I"contact your desired Service Providers and visit our website atwww.kyocera-wireless.com for further assistance." Is it possible forsomeone to advise any news regarding this product? Thank you so verymuch in advance."

Just moments ago I received this from Verizon:

Dear Gary Ploski,
Thank you for contacting the Verizon Wireless website. As part of our Worry Free Guarantee, your concern becomes our concern the first time you contact us. We are happy to assist you with your equipment question.

Currently, there is no information available regarding the Kyocera Koi phone. We apologize for any inconvenience.

If you would like to receive e-mail updates regarding new products and services, please click on "E-mail Updates" from the "Support" tab located at the top of our www.verizonwireless.com home page.

Please write to us again through www.verizonwireless.com if you have any further questions.

Verizon Wireless
Data Technical Support
"We never stop working for you!"


)Blank stare(

"We never stop working for you!" HAHAHAH! I guess providing misinformation is working for me. Damn! Fooled me somethin fierce. Of course I had to reply and rub it in that the phone is ON THEIR SITE and available now.

Frustrating. So extremely frustrating.

11-24-2004 12:03 pm

Techy Week! & Isolated?!

Fah! Happy times for the geek in me!

My foray into digital media arrived today at 10:26! Over the past few days I've imported over 145 CDs. Phew! Almost half way there. I've found music again! I'm so excited! Lota Babe chants! "LALALA!!!" Soon enough I'll pack up my stuff and set sail for See-Tee - along with my tower. I can't leave all the music here in NY while the iPod waits for an injection of LIFE! LALALA!

I gl33!!!

On another note of TECH FUN... I found last night a post telling me EXACTLY what Kyocera and Verizonwireless couldn't (wouldn't?) tell me - a release date for the Kyocera Koi/KX2. When? YESTERDAY! 11/23! HO-HA! There it is on the left. How cool is the phone? It's not a flip phone and it's not a brick phone. It's an updated slider phone with a great camera built in (1.2 megapixel camera with digital zoom and integrated flash). OH, and it records videos too (up to 15 seconds in length). So utter happy about this release. Uber utterly happy.

Non-techy news just filtered in about 30 minutes ago which is even better news than the above stated goodness!

Ms. Emma will not find herself in utter captivity until Sunday morning. The "Hulk" (read: radioactive) treatment/injection will only coarse through her system for 24 hours. Meaning? Meaning she'll be able to see other life forms sooner than Sunday. HA!

The thought of being in complete isolation from Wednesday until Sunday isn't the most exciting thought. In fact I'd say it's a pretty lonely thought. Guess that thought can be tossed to the wind along with the summer... Er, yea. So what if it's been in the 50's and 60's the past couple weeks. It's 'technically' fall. Yea. Right. Uh huh.

So with those happy things noted I will now enjoy the comfort of the warm water the shower has on pause for me and then scurry up to see-tee just to go to MA tomorrow. But... I'll have my iPod with me. = D W3rd.

11-24-2004 11:30 am

Monday, November 22, 2004
Eastern Europe Name Game

Renata has "Eastern Europeanized" my first name to: Garychky


Now it's time fo' sleep. Sleep well Cali-gal.

11-22-2004 12:48 am

Step 1, Step 2, and Step 3?

What are the steps?

Research, research, and more research. And they have led me to a conclusion... Actually it's led me to many conclusions. First – I know very little about music codecs. This is most unsettling. AAC and MP3... both are industry standards but each will provide a very different musical experience for the ear and other things...

Choose Between MP3 and AAC (original page – devhardware.com)
Apple’s current implementation of AAC in iTunes and the iPods has a lot to commend it. AAC delivers high-quality audio, small file size, and enough flexibility for most purposes. But if you want to use the files you rip from a CD on a portable player that doesn’t support AAC, or you need to play them using a software player that doesn’t support AAC, choose MP3 instead.
Similarly, if you want to share your music files with other people in any way other than sharing your music library via iTunes, MP3 is the way to go—but remember that you need the copyright holder’s explicit authorization to copy and distribute music.

Another note of interest is:

To tell if an AAC file is protected or not, choose File | Get Info and check the Kind readout on the Summary tab of the Song Information dialog box. If the file is protected, the Kind readout reads Protected AAC Audio File. If not, Kind reads AAC Audio File. Alternatively, check the file extension: the .m4p extension indicates a protected file, whereas the .m4a extension indicates an unprotected file.

Sigh... yea. Have I decided which format to use? HA! Far from it. I'm waiting on someone in the music field to let me know what he thinks. Hopefully he'll get back to me soon.

But the big happy is I decided to buy a iPhoto. I am actually going to buy one! And later on next year I'm thinkin... iBook. Hmm.

Heheh. Heheh. = D

iPhoto. I'm actually excited to buy a musical device again. It's probably the first time in years that music has interested me. YESSSSSAH! SWEET!

What else is going on brain. What else?

AH! Japan... Jacek and I are 100% set to go. Another may join us too. Kazi just needs to confirm if another would be okay. Kazi?! Can you hear me? Hello hello? Iko!

Emma is finishing up her 500 lap race this week! Just a dash of the 'radio' and a dash of 'iso' time and you get one non-cancrum emma. Less than one week to go! Hoo Ha! And then it's off to Woodbury Commons with Alice, Eric, Emma, Avenga? and lil ol me. No spending for me though. I'll be listening to me tunes. "Lalala!"

Time for tempur time. T time indeed!

11-22-2004 12:45 am
Wednesday, November 17, 2004
Weekends are Weeeeee! (test to myself)

11/12, 11/13, & 11/14 impacted me in ways I didn't expect.

On the 12th I experienced passion where I hadn't thought it likely.

On the 13th I felt uncomfort and fear (within my dreams related to the earlier uncomfort).

On the 14th I vocalized my thoughts even though it made sense to stay silent.

Hot Damn! What a wild ride!

After talking with Alice and telling her about my views on death I couldn't resort to my earlier habits and stay quiet. What's the point of living within a lie? Ha! What's even worse is living within a truth (in silence). It's so easy to do. That's the most frustrating thing! We all do it too. We want to say something because we KNOW "it" for a fact but we're too afraid to speak our mind or take action.

Eff that me! Eff that indEEd! Since I accepted that, lol this is going to seem completely ungrounded with no explanation to qualify it, I'm comfortable with death I've been feeling, seeing, living life more than ever before. Were I to be told that I'd die tomorrow I wouldn't feel a sense of fear regarding my life choices. My confidence in my decision making is beyond what I could have ever predicted. I need to elaborate on this later.

Okay. My point. Focus. Focus.

I think I know something but I'm not exactly sure so I want to test myself by posting it in a hidden entry. Ah. Oki-doke. Time for bed in a few minutes - once the back-up of the gallery-o-pix is finished. Ahh...

I think I found "her". I actually think I found... the "one". Since I know who I'm talking about I'm going to leave it at that. Voila. Cha-ching. 11-17-2004 12:24 am

Weekends are Weeeeee!

11/12, 11/13, & 11/14 impacted me in ways I didn't expect.

On the 12th I experienced passion where I hadn't thought it likely.

On the 13th I felt uncomfort and fear (within my dreams related to the earlier uncomfort).

On the 14th I vocalized my thoughts even though it made sense to stay silent.

Hot Damn! What a wild ride!

After talking with Alice and telling her about my views on death I couldn't resort to my earlier habits and stay quiet. What's the point of living within a lie? Ha! What's even worse is living within a truth (in silence). It's so easy to do. That's the most frustrating thing! We all do it too. We want to say something because we KNOW "it" for a fact but we're too afraid to speak our mind or take action.

Eff that me! Eff that indEEd! Since I accepted that, lol this is going to seem completely ungrounded with no explanation to qualify it, I'm comfortable with death I've been feeling, seeing, living life more than ever before. Were I to be told that I'd die tomorrow I wouldn't feel a sense of fear regarding my life choices. My confidence in my decision making is beyond what I could have ever predicted. I need to elaborate on this later.

Okay. My point. Focus. Focus.

I think I know something but I'm not exactly sure so I want to test myself by posting it in a hidden entry. Ah. Oki-doke. Time for bed in a few minutes - once the back-up of the gallery-o-pix is finished. Ahh...

11-17-2004 12:22 am

Sunday, November 14, 2004
The Swap

)Big breath( Well... It's done. I think. If I desire to read all of Douglas Adams's work I can. It is wrapped nicely in a black hard cover book resting down stairs in a bag along with a few other things that are mine, and one thing that is not. Hence... "It's done. I think."

BT, Alice were kind enough to acompany me to drop of someone's belongings at their mother's place. En route my front right wheel decided to let out a ear scratching noise which I was able to fix after returning to me mudda's - Strange. Thanks to the both of you again. While at the house there were about 2 minutes of uncomfortable dialog primarily with Alice. BT and I had little to add. The most I felt able to say was "have a safe trip" and the like.

It's 12:32 AM and Alice has found never-never-land. I'm trying to sort through the true finality of things. While speaking with Emma I said something to the effect of "I'm just glad it's done." but I was far from straight forward with my emotions. Even at this present moment I'm not sure which word(s) to use.

Though. Hmm. Earlier the word sad entered my mind and I felt a couple times today some random swells (of finality). Things end. That's the way it works. Some end with glee, others simply don't.

When will I be able to pin-point this? I wonder. Then again, I may have already.

Maybe I have already.


Heh. It's obvious to me that when I open my eyes and feel that my eyelashes are stuck together that my eyes are nearly closed. I just blinked and felt this separation. Time foh sleep. Mmm, sleep.

11-14-2004 12:31 am

Saturday, November 13, 2004
Snow in NY

Sometimes things happen when you least expect it. Sometimes things happen because they're supposed to. And then there's just the rest of the stuff... Um... yea. It SNOWED! Of course there was little left to see when I finally grabbed my camera but if you look at the windshield of my car you'll notice the white stuff... No not the kanji, the other white stuff. Suhweet!

Thinking forward I'm extremely excited about this weekend because of all the opportunities. Alice is joining me for a long overdue 'hang out' together. On tap first is Woodland's game in New Canaan where I'll see Meg do her keepah thing with excellence. Hoo ha! After that it's a day filled with driving, stopping, rehearsing, eating, and hanging. Sunday will be pretty damn similar except NY comes into the fray. NI!

Mr. Trent and I have some plans for the rest of the world at http://rememberinghypatia.com – check it out. As he wrote in an email to me quoting two very famous men from history: Shakespeare and Alexander.

"Let Every Man be Master of His Time." - Shakespeare
"What Good are Possessions to Me if I Achieve Nothing?" - Alexander

It is time he received the notoriety he deserves. Here's to the Humanist for your support of my best friend. Together we will make BT KNOWN.

Hehehe... it snowed. At 12:21 it's still on the porch room outside my room! Heheheh. Though, it's not on my car anymore. Alas.

Completely confusing me was a post card I received yesterday stating "Talk to you again some time." from someone that recently said "I don't need to speak to you...". Um, yea... confused.

)shaking head kinda confused( even )shivers through the body knda confused(

And so Alice is late so I must act surprised. No, that's actually pretty much on the mark for things "Alice" related. Good thing I told her to be here 1 hour before I planned on leaving. = D Figured ya out Alice! BWAAAHAH! You'll never know if I'm tricking you or not! BWAHAHAH!

Wow... Snow! I'm so giddy about it. "Lalala!" - Babe

11-13-2004 12:11 pm
Friday, November 12, 2004
Chants of the letters: M, F, and A!

I'm going to! BWAAHAHAH!

I'm actually going to graduate again!

Yesterday I was told that I could enroll into the MFA program officially next Fall! I have been hoping and hoping and hoping for this day to come and it has! It couldn't have happened at a better time too! Work, again, rules and school just keeps getting better.

I'm involved in two readings: one in NY at SLC, an original piece about Lizzie Borden, and another in CT with Ed for the re-opening of the Palace Theatre in Waterbury, CT. Hells yes! Things are Grrrrrrrrrrrrreat!

Read about the Lizzie Borden's Case: http://www.law.umkc.edu/faculty/projects/ftrials/LizzieBorden/bordenhome.html

I can't find anything about "Symphony Pastoral. Grumble, grumble.

Mari and I spoke about the MFA program and I really felt the excitement coarse through me! Amazed uber stoked excitement only begins to describe the inner glee within. T'heheheheh!

Now I need to determine what classes I want to add to my schedule! YES YES YES! I am allowed to take more than one 'module'. Three modules actually make up 1 'class' so I do lotsa smiles lotsa. = D McDonald's gives em free so stop by and pick one up if you run out. I have a large surplus on hand so you won't be seeing me in McDonald's any time soon. Though they're shakes are quite tempting... Hmm.

Not much more to report. Oh!

Woodland High School girls... Congratulation on the NVL title! I may be a Holy Cross alum but I have been celebrating the win since I was told of your blowout win vs. Torrington! B. I. N. G. O! With your first game won in the state tourney it's on to New Canaan on Saturday... Rock on ladies. Especially the keepah! Rock on Meg. Rock on!

Now is time to rest in the land of tempur.

11-12-2004 12:39 am
Woodland High School - Tourny Chart

2004 Division M Girls Soccer

First RoundSecond RoundQuarterfinalSemifinalFinal
1 Lyman Memorial
  Lyman Memorial 1-0(2OT)
Rocky Hill
  Lyman Memorial (16-0-1)
Lauralton Hall (9-8-1)
@Lyman Memorial
16 Coventry
17 Rocky Hill 1-0
8 Tolland
25 Lauralton Hall 3-0
  Lauralton Hall 3-0
Bacon Academy
9 Morgan
24 Bacon Academy 3-2
4 New Canaan
  New Canaan 4-0
East Catholic
  New Canaan (14-2-0)
Woodland (13-1-3)
@New Canaan
13 East Catholic 2-0
20 Avon
 Woodland 2-1
St. Joseph
12 St. Joseph 6-0
21 Ellington
2 Lewis Mills
  Lewis Mills
Darien 2-1
  Darien (9-4-5)
Holy Cross (13-3-1)
@Teikyo Post
15 Darien 4-0
18 Northwestern
7 Holy Cross
  Holy Cross 3-0
North Branford
10 North Branford 1-0
23 Fairfield Ludlowe
3 Suffield
  Suffield 5-2
  Suffield (15-1-1)
Stonington (13-3-0)
14 Montville
19 Plainville 4-2
6 Stonington
  Stonington 3-1
11 Nonnewaug
22 Bethel 3-0

11-12-2004 12:39 am
Saturday, November 06, 2004
Jack's Additional Thoughts

Last thoughts before bed. How I'm awake at 2:50 AM I have no idea.

V ball is done, done, and done. We lost to Bard this, er, last evening in 3 games. It's sad to see the season end, but it was a damn impressive turn around from last year: 3-12 vs this year 6-9. My hope was for a split but for what was accomplished I can't say I'm disappointed. The team, the coaching staff, and everyone individually seemed to learn a great deal this year. All in all a hats off year to the team! = D Rock on Gryphons! Rock on!

And the other side note. For more then 2 months I was free of any drama in my life. Honest and truly. There was nothing that was leaching, draining, pulling from me, nothing. The most difficult thing I was put through was being there for someone through a life altering chain of events. Other than that I've been grounded spiritually, mentally, and physically. It's been fantastic.

I had hoped to have one (last) civil conversation with None with the hopes that we could both have at least this (last) chance to "fix" things so that communication could be possible. As things have shown themselves to be this appears to a hope that is too far reaching for even the mighty Zeus. Hey big Z you're a good dude, keep up your god'ing, I hear things are going pretty god for you in history. = D

And now I find that I need sleep since my train leaves at 7:02 AM. My Zeus that's in 4 hours. Sigh. THUMP

11-06-2004 02:47 am

Jack's Complete Lack of Surprise

Hi I'm "Jack's complete lack of surprise" and I'd like to say a few things about the present state of affairs in what I call "Jack's Life".

I think a viewing of Fight Club is in order. I have a pent up sense of rage within me that needs releasing and that is DEFINITELY one of those pick-me-up films ready and at the helm.

LOL. Many serious amounts of true LOL today and it all started just before I left work. I was called "judgmental". ME! LOL! If there is something I do in my life actively, which there are many things such as breathing, living, reading, etc ñ hmm, I do lots of somethings = ) heh ñ back to the point, if there is something I do in my life actively is to NOT judge people. I may disagree with someone's opinion but I will accept their position as being just that ñ their position.

While in Japan I was advised of a philosophy of life by a fellow American that had started the JET Programme the same time I did. He talked about a book: I'm OK, you're OK by Thomas Harris. To this day I have not read the book but the core theory has stuck with me to such an extent that I rarely find the need to re-think the theory but instead realize how I'm not adhering to the lifestyle of choice I wish to follow ñ I'm OK, you're OK.

It comes down to making an attempt at understanding someone else's perspective. At times this process frustrates the questioned because they feel like they're being attacked but what can happen is that the questioner (ME!) is able have a better understanding why Person A believes THIS and why Person B doesn't believe THIS. It is NOT easy. I find, at times that I slip into a judgmental mindset and then do my best to quickly move back to a listening mindset.

As mentioned above I have been titled "judgmental" which I find to be ever so hilarious for multiple reasons. Do I want to elaborate. not at 2AM. If I were a judgmental person I would decree that actions taken by anyone are "wrong", "stupid", or just plain "ridiculous". This is something I DO NOT DO. Instead I commend others on their realizations. I help, when requested, friends through rough times and listen to their troubles. I ask friends, new and old, questions about their points of view so that I know if how not to step on their toes.

LOL. Oy! Yes'm sir, madam, I am going to deem you UNWORTHY of anything and EVERYTHING you do in your life. I KNOW what is good for you and I KNOW what is RIGHT for you in your life. OMGOMGOMG, I can't do it. It's just not me. LOL... Oy vey. I just can't. )shaking head(

So all those people out there that want to know "the" way... go shake someone else's tree. I'm sorry to tell you that I don't have any answers for you.

Court is adjourned! )BANG BANG(

11-06-2004 02:09 am

Thursday, November 04, 2004
The DOD?

It happened before:

And it may happen again.

Here are new journal entries that I posted yesterday. Probably the FIRST I've ever posted that speak my mind regarding the present state of the US politically.

2¢… Nearing 11/4 - 194 visited on 11/4 More information is below.
2¢… My Fear presented Visually - 193 visited on 11/4 More information is below.
2¢… Late 11/3 - 192 visited on 11/4 More information is below.
2¢… A True Snow Ball Effect - 191 - This wasn't viewed. More information is below.
2¢… Drama Drama Drama - 190 visited on 10/29 More information is below.
2¢… At This Time of Day Titles Mean Nothing -189 visited on 10/29 More information is below.

Yesterday I posted a few thoughts about the election. Simple enough.
This morning I looked at my log files and saw the following: - - [04/Nov/2004:08:21:42 -0500] "GET /modules.php?name=Journal&file=display&jid=194 HTTP/1.1" 200 23280 - - [04/Nov/2004:08:23:06 -0500] "GET /modules.php?name=Journal&file=display&jid=193 HTTP/1.1" 200 20009

Curious to know who it was I went to http://www.arin.net and punched in the IP.

OrgName: DoD Network Information Center
Address: 7990 Science Applications Ct
Address: M/S CV 50
City: Vienna
StateProv: VA
PostalCode: 22183-7000
Country: US

NetRange: -
NetHandle: NET-28-0-0-0-1
NetType: Direct Allocation
Comment: 7790 Science Applicationis Crt.,
Comment: Vienna, VA 22183 US
RegDate: 1996-03-11
Updated: 2000-04-13

TechName: Network DoD
TechPhone: +1-703-676-1051
TechEmail: HOSTMASTER@nic.mil

OrgTechName: Network DoD
OrgTechPhone: +1-703-676-1051
OrgTechEmail: HOSTMASTER@nic.mil

# ARIN WHOIS database, last updated 2004-11-03 19:10
# Enter ? for additional hints on searching ARIN's WHOIS database.

The DOD!? Curious to see if the DOD has EVER visited my site before (from this same IP) so I took a look through my log file and found the following:

# grep /var/log/httpd/garyploski.com-access_log - - [25/Jun/2004:23:03:57 -0400] "GET /images/bam/dinnertime.jpg HTTP/1.0" 200 7758 - - [01/Aug/2004:12:30:13 -0400] "GET /images/bam/dinnertime.jpg HTTP/1.0" 200 7758 - - [02/Aug/2004:14:29:38 -0400] "GET /images/bam/bungeejump.jpg HTTP/1.0" 200 9029 - - [08/Aug/2004:21:19:52 -0400] "GET /images/bam/fleshworld.jpg HTTP/1.0" 200 17712 - - [01/Oct/2004:06:39:48 -0400] "HEAD /images/bam/mrningrush.jpg HTTP/1.0" 200 - - - [01/Oct/2004:23:25:59 -0400] "HEAD /images/bam/mrningrush.jpg HTTP/1.0" 200 - - - [22/Oct/2004:02:29:41 -0400] "GET /images/topics/gallery.gif HTTP/1.0" 200 2044 - - [23/Oct/2004:15:07:23 -0400] "GET /images/topics/gallery.gif HTTP/1.0" 200 2044 - - [25/Oct/2004:19:32:46 -0400] "GET /albums/album05/16_G.thumb.jpg HTTP/1.0" 200 6846 - - [29/Oct/2004:01:53:49 -0400] "GET /modules.php?name=Journal&file=display&jid=189 HTTP/1.0" 200 20864 - - [29/Oct/2004:01:55:08 -0400] "GET /modules.php?name=Journal&file=display&jid=190 HTTP/1.1" 200 22538 - - [29/Oct/2004:01:58:15 -0400] "GET /albums/1997/gp_xmas.thumb.gif HTTP/1.1" 200 18937 - - [31/Oct/2004:00:09:34 -0400] "GET /themes/demo/images/logo.gif HTTP/1.0" 200 11677 - - [31/Oct/2004:00:09:35 -0400] "GET /images/blocks/ur-author.gif HTTP/1.1" 200 909 - - [31/Oct/2004:00:09:37 -0400] "GET /images/blocks/ur-member.gif HTTP/1.1" 200 909 - - [04/Nov/2004:02:44:32 -0500] "GET /modules.php?name=Journal&file=display&jid=192 HTTP/1.0" 200 20106 - - [04/Nov/2004:02:45:03 -0500] "GET /modules.php?name=Journal&file=display&jid=193 HTTP/1.1" 200 20009 - - [04/Nov/2004:02:45:27 -0500] "GET /modules.php?name=Journal&file=display&jid=194 HTTP/1.1" 200 23280 - - [04/Nov/2004:02:48:34 -0500] "GET /albums/album11/IMG10.thumb.jpg HTTP/1.1" 200 9211

Here's my visit to the 194 entry just after I posted it: - - [03/Nov/2004:23:30:56 -0500] "GET /modules.php?name=Journal&file=display&jid=194 HTTP/1.1" 200 25920

Mind the fact that I posted 192, 193, and 194 at random times yesterday but 194 was posted at approximately 11:30. In just over 3 hours my site was visited by the DOD. Now if my site was visited by tens, or even hundreds, or thousands of people I'd say "Enh, just a routine visit." But in reality my page is visited by friends and family. That's about all. Interesting stuff. I'm not sure what to make of it but as the link at the top of the page shows... "things" happen. I'll keep everyone in the loop. It's curious to know that someone has read my journal entries at the DOD. I wonder if they're worried about me. Will someone look into my background? Will they keep an eye on me? The poor girl linked at the top of the page went through a rediculous ordeal speaking her mind on the net. I don't believe I said anything wrong in any of my posts. If anything does come about due to my posts I'll be sure to let everyone know. Watchin the logs.... I'm GP.

11-04-2004 11:06 am

Wednesday, November 03, 2004
Nearing 11/4

The UK reacts:
The Daily Mirror - A large picture of Bush with this caption: ìHow can 59,054,087 be so dumb!î

Canada reacts:
Statistics show the number of U.S. workers entering Canada dropped to 15,789 in 2002 from 21,627 in 2000. In 1981 some 10,030 Americans gained permanent residency, compared to 5,541 in 2003.

Asked if there had been signs of increased U.S. interest, Sgro said: "Not yet, but we'll see tomorrow."
Full Story on Yahoo!

On a whim, actually, after reading up on some exit polls, a group of friends decided to go to Boston to hopefully celebrate a Kerry win. Obviously that was not what happened. Instead, Ed, Jacek, BT, Emma, Emma, and I enjoyed each other's company, along with thousands of others, in Boston watching and hoping for numbers to go the way of "blue".

This, we now know, did not happen. Interesting information has been discussed regarding exit polling that took place yesterday which led to last nights adventure. One which I am entirely happy to have gone on.

Excerpt regarding exit polls:
While pollsters, who conducted the exit surveys and news outlets that paid for them blamed others for mishandling the information, some experts found fault with the data itself.

"We have an exit poll crisis," said pollster John Zogby, whose own Election Day predictions that Kerry would take Ohio and Florida proved wrong. He said he had used the exit poll data to confirm conclusions he had based on his own polling.

Randomly the second Emma joined the group while it rained. Sheryl Crow put nearly everyone to sleep with her emotionless and slow set. Jon Bon Jovi started off strong but fell into a calming set as well. Accoustic CAN be energizing but they seemed to have none to give. Interestingly the Black Eyed Peas had everyone dancing and pumped up when we arrived at 930ish. Too bad they couldn't play all night.

So the evening was a scratch but the adventure was great. How many times will I do this in my life. Once is a great number, twice? Hmm, who knows what the future may hold.

It wasn't until 5pm that I saw my place in NY. The drive back was easy because the road was empty, but my mind was far from empty. Fear of someone else's morality imposed on me truly scares me. I'm capable of determining what is moral without Bush's religious decrees imposed upon me.

I worry where we'll be in 4 years regarding science, Roe v. Wade, the Patriot Act, etc. Will we be free with the loss of additional freedoms or will he prove me and the other 48% of America that don't believe in him wrong? Time will tell.

(Referring to the image to the right.) I am extremely disappointed by the number of voters that actually voted. It appears that we're looking at an apathetic America still. Only 58%-60% of the public voted. One word ñ PATHETIC. I had said to many friends that if a mass of people went out and voted and Bush was chosen I would stand behind the decision without question but this... these numbers are nearly IDENTICAL to the numbers since 1980. After all the press, campaigning, etc, etc, etc.. 58-60% is all we could muster. Pathetic America. Pathetic.

While not trying to sound pessimistic, yet knowing this is going to be apessimistic statement, "We get what we deserve because we get what we choose."

11-03-2004 11:30 pm

My Fear presented Visually

Thanks to Jacek I have a visual available that helps to explain my fear of the next four years. And it came in just mere moments after I posted my previous journal. Yea Jacek!

11-03-2004 05:32 pm

Late 11/3

It's 5:37 and the "winner" has been known for most of the day now. I can say the following with UTTER certainty:

I'm exhausted.
Going to Boston was definitely worth it.
I'm very scared where our country is going to go in regard to religion and morality.

Practice calls and then I plan on heading home to install the backup power supply. YEA!

11-03-2004 05:25 pm

Tuesday, November 02, 2004
A True Snow Ball Effect

After delivering my monologue in class today I was told the following! "I think you're all set. We can definitely put this to sleep." WOW! Happily there were some suggestions but it wasn't related to the text per se. Instead it was pointed out to me that I dropped various sounds: z's, v's, g's t's ñ all to varying degrees during the monologue. I'm stoked to know that he's (Micheal) going to give me some exercises to work on these sounds!

Hot damn it felt good! I honestly don't know of another time in my life where I've felt this connected to acting. I'm feeling pain, excitement, fear, compassion, etc without the need to FOCUS on a thought or experience in my life. I'm simply taking these written experiences from the page and funneling it through me empowering it with my own choices and intentions.

I knew I was ready to experience new emotion after months and months and months of self dissection (nods to Avenga and Emma for their help, input, etc.) I'm actually able to see my self doubts so clearly that I'm able to pin point WHERE they came from! I've been able to see my calmness and ability to listen to others and accept other's opinions while flat out disagreeing with them with ease lately.

I'm okay, you're okay inDEED!

Nervous energy is coursing through me this early morning knowing that this is the day we choose who will lead us for the next four years. I'm painfully worried and excited at the same time. Work will be interesting I'm thinking. How many people will get ANYTHING accomplished during the day. Seriously. Well, I guess it will be a short day for most ñ 9-2ish ñ at that point numbers will be revealed. At least that's what I be tinkin.

AH! I have to note something mucho-mega-buck-rockin that happened in the gym while working on the incline bench press. YESSAH! Take two 60 lb, and two 65 lb weights and proceed to go through a set of 10 reps with the 60 lb weights. Follow that up with 10 reps using the 65 lb weights. Finish up with 8 reps using the 65 lb weights again. HOOOOOOHA! Hells yes! Breaking down the wall! 65 friggin pounds!

That's only 30 pounds off my weight. AND, this is with free weights. ROCK! Slow and steady has HOT DAMN well been winning this race. I feel AMAZINGLY INTENSE physically. My abs are kickin ass with a new method I've been doing for about 3-4 weeks now and AND! OH I forgot about this.. My left arm is starting to catch up to my right arm. Big emphasis on starting to catch up. It's got a long road ahead of it. 0= ) 40 lb seated bicep curls have been proving extremely effective since I bumped up the weight from 30 to 40 lbs. It's hella difficulty but it sure is providing results! And bingo was his name-o.

Hmm. Yea. Ha! So mucha da gewd. So mucha-da.

Congrats to the Woodland High School Girls Varsity Soccer Team for winning your FIRST NVL Championship! Hats of to the Keepah! Meg... Haha. She truly impressed me with her game play this past weekend. I'm glad I got to see her play. My fingers are crossed in hopes that she'll find a desire to play in college. It'd be such a shame to let her talent fade off because of... well, "political reasons" cough her coach only playing her Ω of every game but one during her senior year cough cough. = D At least I hide my thought somewhere between those coughs. Er... I mean it's good that ONLY the coughs were noticed.

ALRIGHT! Time for a monologue and then bed.

Hamlet, Act III, Scene II
A hall in the castle.
Enter HAMLET and Players

HAMLET Speak the speech, I pray you, as I pronounced it to you, trippingly on the tongue: but if you mouth it, as many of your players do, I had as lief the town-crier spoke my lines. Nor do not saw the air too much with your hand, thus, but use all gently; for in the very torrent, tempest, and, as I may say, the whirlwind of passion, you must acquire and beget a temperance that may give it smoothness. O, it offends me to the soul to hear a robustious periwig-pated fellow tear a passion to tatters, to very rags, to split the ears of the groundlings, who for the most part are capable of nothing but inexplicable dumbshows and noise: I would have such a fellow whipped for o'erdoing Termagant; it out-herods Herod: pray you, avoid it.

First Player I warrant your honour.

HAMLET Be not too tame neither, but let your own discretion be your tutor: suit the action to the word, the word to the action; with this special o'erstep not the modesty of nature: for any thing so overdone is from the purpose of playing, whose end, both at the first and now, was and is, to hold, as 'twere, the mirror up to nature; to show virtue her own feature, scorn her own image, and the very age and body of the time his form and pressure. Now this overdone, or come tardy off, though it make the unskilful laugh, cannot but make the judicious grieve; the censure of the which one must in your allowance o'erweigh a whole theatre of others. O, there be players that I have seen play, and heard others praise, and that highly, not to speak it profanely, that, neither having the accent of Christians nor the gait of Christian, pagan, nor man, have so strutted and bellowed that I have thought some of nature's journeymen had made men and not made them well, they imitated humanity so abominably.

First Player I hope we have reformed that indifferently with us, sir.

HAMLET O, reform it altogether. And let those that play your clowns speak no more than is set down for them; for there be of them that will themselves laugh, to set on some quantity of barren spectators to laugh too; though, in the mean time, some necessary question of the play be then to be considered: that's villanous, and shows a most pitiful ambition in the fool that uses it. Go, make you ready.Nike said it best "Just do it" Or was that Jonathan Larson "No day but today." Or was it an unknown "Don't cry because its over, smile because it happened." Well, whomever it was I know that I've finally found inner peace. Acceptance of one's traits and faults is an excessively difficult task. To walk the road takes risk. To live it takes courage. To face and accept the past requires time and help. Ignoring it requires fear and denial, making it your own and taking it with you as you move forward is profound. I'm ready to take another step...




Or three. Thump to the tempur says me body.

11-02-2004 01:47 am

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