Monday, January 30, 2006
Professional Wedding Pix Online

I am so fraggin stoked to be able to say this...

The wedding pix are on-line! The link is below and the password is cute and cuddly.

The link - Wedding pix
The password - kitten

Sunday, January 29, 2006
Violence and Drama

Everyone loves it. Deep down inside we want to see more of it. We tune into the news at 6 for the latest horrible story of the day. Then, just 5 hours later, we want more. Come the morning we're fed our morning breakfast --- more pain, death, horror, etc. Soon after we scurry off to school, work, or to whatever else is on the schedule for the day. Whoohoo! It's going to be a great day. But wait! There's more. The radio has our drama playing out for us to hear... All... Day... Long. Sure enough there is also work/school drama if the radio isn't available.

What do we do with it when it isn't ours? BANG BANG BANG baby! We've got our TV shows and movies on tap. We've got books, short stories, poems. Name it. Whoooo! We love it. Violence and drama feed our addictions. We're happy to have it and pained when it's gone. It hurts us, and shows us that we are okay. Someone is in a position worse than us. The Romans called it sport and we call it entertainment. One suuuuure does sound over simplified. DING! That's because it is. Entertainment. Mmm mmm mmm. Love the stuff. I'm a fool for it. Lately emma and I have been transfixed with a HBO show -- Oz. Seasons 1-2 teased us a long time ago but 3-5 (4 being a double season) has held us at bay like someone in search of some 'tits'. Ohh yea we needed to know what HAPPENED. We still need to know. ARGH! Season 6 of Oz has been delayed for some reason. Even the creator doesn't know what's holding up the release. Grr.

Violence and drama... It fits well on a DVD, in a book, and even in our imagination but that's where I'm happy to leave it. Lately we've been plagued with drama - some by choice and some not so - and this is the week to wrap things up.

By the end of this week we'll know if a new language will be studied, a new skill set will begin development, and if the silence will be broken. It couldn't be Friday any faster. Thank goodness it's only drama and not violence we're sifting through. Exponentials hurt the brain.

Saturday, January 28, 2006
Lovely Football - Onitsuka

Brilliance/hilarity to follow...
Onitsuka Tiger (aka ASICS) - Lovely Football

Lovely football.
Lovely Greenpitch.

Together we are lots of goal goal goal.
And when the saints go marching on and on.
We ate all pies and sing a football song.
Together we are lots of goal goal goal.
Hey Tiger kick the ball.
Kick the ball.
Kick the ball in goal.
Hey Tiger.
Kick the ball.
Kick the ball.
Kick the ball in goal.

Women - Onitsuka.
Men - Lovely goalnet.
Women - Onitsuka.
Men - Lovely linesmen.

Together we are lots of goal goal goal.
We're all one team you'll never walk alone.
For football's coming home it's coming home.
Together we are lots of goal goal goal.
Nah nah nah naaah na nah.
Naaah na nah.
Kick the ball in goal.
Nah nah nah naaah na nah.
Nah nah nah.
Kick the ball in goal.

Women - Onitsuka.
Men - Lovely ref'rees.
Women - Onitsuka.
Men - Lovely football.

Satan was a Lesbian

Many years ago I upset brought a smile to a friends face with this lovely image to the right. Satan was a Lesbian. What a brilliant postcard. I though, she'll get a kick out of this. Yes, yes, yes. Well, many many months later I learned that her mom and dad were in shock at this blasphemous image.

Ahhh, money well spent. If only there were more fun postcards to send to people. Hmm, now that I say it I think I may need to do that again. Sending a postcard tis cheap and the reactions are great fun! New search entered into mind for later retrieval. Hehehehehe. This is going to be simple and inexpensive fun!

It seems fitting that a faculty member at SLC had this on their door. What a way to be brought back to the past reminded of the laughter and joy that my friend and I shared. Ahhh, memories. Two words - Satan and lesbian. El. Oh. El.

Wednesday, January 25, 2006

It's late. I should be sleeping but reading the news and catching up with techy fun news has kept me up. But now I have something fun to sing to my friends! All together now... Oha!

Tuesday, January 24, 2006
Focusing on the Now

For some time now things in my head have been ready to burst out. Things have been shaky on certain ground lately and because of that I have not been able to focus as I'd prefer.

Recently I made the decision to scale back my theater involvement for a greater importance. Nothing is more important than the first few months of my marriage to emma. We have been living together for close to one year now and have known each other for more than three years but the game is different now. This is our time to create anew our relationship with complete confidence that we truly want to be together.

Those pangs and doubts felt during a relationship are now erased.

I hadn't thought much on the topic of doubt. Yup. )smile( I am so utterly sure of the decision(s) made with emma that I haven't been doubting anything about us. Ahhh, a warm happy feeling does flow over and through me. No more doubts. No more.

Where was I... Ah yes, theater. One reading, completed last night, and one large show set for April 27-29 show times, and possibly one grad piece will fill my 15 weeks of school. That's it. No more, no less. Sometime in the next week to ten days we will know if we're going to get tickets to the World Cup in Germany (England Vs. Paraguay, Japan Vs. Australia, and Italy Vs. U.S.A).

The drawing is slated for 1/31 and we should know by 2/2 if we're in. There is no reason that we can see that would keep us from getting tickets but we are not counting it as locked and loaded just yet. Also, emma has a great opportunity that she will meet head on tomorrow (Wed.) at about 2:30 PM. Both of us have HUGE hopes that it goes the way of yea. Tis the year of yea... =) That sure is how things have been leading up to I dare say.

BT is less than 20 books away from 500. School/Work is going wonderfully. Things have been great here at 11o1. The wedding (day) was amazing. Now... If two more things fall into place. Argh! The anticipation is so frustrating sometimes.

Fortunately there is another positive. I received my copy of The Soldier's Tale and have copied it to send up to me mudda. The quality was surprisingly good. With two camera angles and good equipment this will be a piece to add to my reel. Sk-ore!

The unstable ground mentioned at the top is the biggest weight on my mind. A plan is in motion to confront the situation head on with bluntness. Neither emma or I wish for this silence to carry on much longer. By the end of this week we will have set in motion our plans. Will they work... Zeus I hope so.


Happily I can say (to myself and via this post) that I have caught up CONSIDERABLY with my e-mail to-do's. If all goes well I think I'll have all a clean starred folder soon enough. Updates and replies all around!

Wednesday, January 18, 2006
The Reply Button

Many friends and family have contacted me recently. I have NOT forgotten about you! I just now began replying to email due to all the events, visitors, etc. that have been a part of taken over my/our lives recently. Keep an eye out for an email from me. There will be one soon. I promise. Yup, I used the P word! W3rd.

Saturday, January 14, 2006
1/2 a Fortnight

For the past week I've been allowing my mind time to simmer. I've also needed the time to do little to nothing. At least two evenings ended before the 11 o'clock hour tolled. When I say ended I mean sleep. emma has been ill since Monday/Tuesday and I've been exhausted.

To summarize the week I can happily say it ended on a great note which should kick the semester off to a great start. Yea to work! Yea to self? imposed deadlines!

I am not in a institution that previously frightened me like few other things on this planet. Fear. The M word. Fear... Marriage.

I don't remember when it all began, when my fear of marriage began. I don't have many references when I think about successful marriages. My mudda and pop divorced when I was barely walking. To this day I know there are so many things that have never been cleared up. I hear it in both of their voices. There is nothing I can do about what happened then and I won't begin to pretend that something will make it all better. They both did for me what the thought best over the years.

The fact does remain that I grew up in a home where marriage was not a part of my day to day life. Instead, marriage was only a topic discussed as a matter of taxes, etc. At least, that's what I thought for a long time until me mudda found herself alone after her partner of 24 years left her. Details of why are unimportant. I fall back on the thought that I witnessed the institution of marriage from the outside with other families.

It should be noted that within my close family a healthy marriage thrived with my aunt and uncle. Thinking on it now I find myself realizing I considered them to be a stable and happy couple in marriage but didn't really think about them as married in the way I saw other families. Maybe it was too close and too difficult to see. Just like seeing things that are in plain site. It's so obvious that you just can't see it.

I remember meeting The Harvey's back in 1996. I remember listening to the four of them speak to each other as equals and yet as children and parents. Each knew their position in the family; yet, still, they knew there was room to breath. I think this was the first time I saw a family do what I thought families did. The Harvey's were, in my eyes, happily married.

I saw each of them living their own lives. I heard them speak to each other equally. I witnessed decisions discussed and made as a couple. Ha. I think I was jealous and hopeful to find what they had.

It it highly important to note, to myself and anyone reading, again that I am writing about the institution of marriage. I would be remiss to ignore what I learned and appreciated over the years with me mudda while I was growing up.

My fear of marriage has long stood as a character trait my friends and family have joked with me about and made fun of me for. The fact that I'm now married I know and expect the random jab. Someone will say "I thought you didn't believe in marriage." I will respond similar to the following "You're right. Neat how things change huh?" We've all done it. EVERYONE of us. At one point we have made the obvious statement or joke knowing that the other person has already heard it, most likely many, many times already. Why do we do it... I don't know. Personally I've been trying to stop myself from doing things like the above noted example for years. It saves me energy and it even saves the recipient the hassle of having to conjure up a retort they really don't feel like digging up just to make the conversation whole.

Tan - Gent. Oy.

My point is things change. Fear slipped away, for me, just over one year ago. The order of my next few thoughts are very much NOT in chronology... I saw another marriage far removed from my family reach it's 30th year milestone. I wasn't 30 at the time but found myself in awe of the achievement. "Thirty years?!" I thought. "I don't know how to understand what that really means. I haven't even been on this planet that long. Thirty years. That is so cool!" The Berman's had found a place in my mind just like the Harvey's.

I know why I was afraid of the M word, the C word, and the K word. I hadn't met her yet. We're told so mind-bogglingly often that we'll "know" when we're ready. We'll know "who" it is. Not for nothin... I thought of marriage 3 times earlier in my life. But something... Something inside always held me back. At the time I didn't know what 'it' was but in time I learned that my gut instinct mind knew more than I was willing to accept. I don't let my emotions guide me. Far too often they've led me into ruts, walls, and unlit paths with no end in sight.

Luck, or whatever one might call it has been on my side over the years. Ha. Yea, a little bit of luck and what others described as hesitation, being closed emotionally, lacking the ability to commit, etc. There were reasons for all of those feelings.

A little over one year ago a committed relationship began after a long, shared, struggle through a bout with cancer. From that day I have not looked back. I was ready and felt it was time. I'd finally met... her. She is sitting in the bedroom we own together right now. We planned, brain stormed, wrote and edited a ceremony that expressed our shared view on the institution of marriage, and so many other things.

If someone notices my left hand they will see a volume of history. A past and a understood commitment.

1/2 a fortnight ago I spoke the following words:
By my own free will, you are the person I choose to marry.
I will love you until the end of my life.
With this ring, I bind myself to you from now until the moment I die.

Last Saturday I married 'her'.

I tremble at the thought of anything happening to her. Knowing that the emotional ride hasn't coursed over/through me yet is exciting. One hour of writing has brought me through the past, a past I hadn't fully flushed out until now. One hour + hindsight = 1/2 a Fortnight

Saturday, January 07, 2006
Quick Lil Bit

One scrooge of a 5-oh, a babbling very conversational manicurist, and this thing they call cold.

Already there have been some extreme highs and lows which is/was to be expected. Last night emma and I actually had a few moments that involved only the two of us. At first it was confusing. Hmm, thinking about it... It's still pretty confusing how we managed to have close to 2 hours to ourselves. = D

A small dinner with Rachel and Kazi was well enjoyed in The Lion's Den which was followed by a grand 'ol time at Michaels Restaurant and Pub. Pix from the evening will be posted on their site soon enough. Sneak a peek here.

Sadly the evening was short lived for the two of us because we needed to review our lines vows and sleep. Which we did VERY, VERY well I must say. So well in fact that emma actually fell back to sleep after the alarm went off. The first time this has ever happened in all the time that I've known her.

The quote of the day was "I fucked him." Ahh what two hours and a bottle or forty two of nail polish will make the brain think/say.

Tuesday, January 03, 2006
Lucky Duck

Yup. That's me over there. I'm a... well, you can read, at least I hope you can read if not I'm wasting Internet black space... Uh, yea, so you got it. = D

Kazi is here and happily, so is Alice. It wasn't easy to get her here because of a car conflict but... She is here now. Tis a wonderfully relaxing time at this moment. Kazi made okonomiyaki (お好み焼き) while I cleaned the kitchen and set the table.

We all then enjoyed a phenomenal meal courtesy of Kazi and his mastery in the kitchen. Ahh. Full happy bellies we all have. Buddha bellies we all have. Mmm. Yea buddha bellies!

Flashing back to earlier... Kazi, emma, and I ventured into the city where we all found some rockin on stuff. My gold was found at the Burton store. emma found hers in Adidas and Kazi found stuff in both stores. The Shaun White ASYM Jacket is ready to protect me in rain, sleet, and on a mountain this Sunday!

The weather was piss poor dropping plenty of chubby rain on us while we attempted to find the store "Cockpit" for Kazi. This was a valiant but doomed search. We later, at 11o1, learned that the store is called Avrix... Um. Yea. Steee-rike one. Tomorrow he and Alice will give it another go. I think.

The funniest most memorable event of the day involved an EYE! HFCIT!

We were about to make the walk to the car. We were finally on our way when we were halted by the red guy light. DO NOT WALK! it said. And so we stood. And stood. And... slash! I thought "Aw man, I got splash'd'ed a lil bit. Heh. That's kinda cool" Within moments 4 people would be laughing because of what was said next. 'that car splashed me in the eye!' A gentleman behind us, along with a lady bust out into laughter and tried to stop... They failed.

One drop of car splashed water made its way into emma's eye and nobody found themselves yelling or cussing. Instead, a group of strangers laughed at the ridiculousness of the situation. First a chipmunk... Second a car splash... Third? Will there be a third for the eye expert? Be patient Mr. and Mrs. Jones. Be patient. At 12:22 I take my leave and waddle to the tempur. I have to )shakes head( work )blinks eyes( tomorrow. Well that's just not right. 0= )

Monday, January 02, 2006
Driving to Alice's

While driving to pick up Alice I vented some news. 0= )

this is an audio post - click to play

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