Earlier today (04/06) I posted on the front page of my site the following:

Dziadz - Adolph Ploski ---To those that knew him I along with my family share your pain in Dziadz's passing. He was an amazing man and will be missed. One memory I have of him brings me back to my newspaper delivery days. He'd help me by driving me to my street and then drive slowly up the road while I, along with cousins at times, ran back and forth from house to house. Afterward we'd all go out for breakfast. Last I saw him recently he was rooting for the UCONN men's team in the NCAA tournament. =` ( I'm going to miss you Dziadz. Rest easy.

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As I stood there I couldn't help but want to take my camera out. Despite the quivering within me I felt the urge to capture the moment of true loyalty, devotion, and love. There, in the intensive care room where my pop, Lin, Kevin, Donna, Keith, Jeff, Donny, aunt Theda, uncle Sal, Emma, and Honey.

It was bitter sweet. Despite everything that was happening in the room - hugs, tears, blank stares. I couldn't help but stare at Honey's hands. It was as if she were warming Dziadz's hands because he'd spent too much time outside. Her energy seemed to stream into his hands like electricity into a bulb. She had situated his left hand within her hands just as if he were alive. I stared so long that I locked the image in my mind and swore to myself that I couldn't forget it. I needed to write down and that's what I've done.

Dziadz passed away today , er, yesterday, at approximately 12:30 pm while I was at work. My pop was the first one to call me with the news at 1:15-ish. After a class that lasted too long (for me) - 45 minutes - I situated a few things at work and then skipped off for 21 to meet up with Emma. She was already there waiting for me, thank you again for letting me lean on you Emma, in the driveway. After a PB&J bagel it was off to St. Mary's Hospital to say my last goodbye.

Looking back at the day it feels as though it was never going to end. My brakes decided that they wanted to be changed... in CT. The driver's side rear set were replaced thanks to Al's brilliance! Once more Al, domo arigato! There was a mini-show for Emma and I while we were at the shop... A new restaurant opened and so it needed trying out so Ian ordered the food. It was delivered... upside down and other wrong ways without forks and/or any other utensils. The restaurant said "no prob" we'll deliver a new order with utensils. Well, a while later a new order arrived happy as can be... only, once more, without utensils. Ahhh, the faux pas of a new business. Heh.

It's now 1:57 AM and I'm still writing not that I've been writing long since we only returned about 30-40 minutes ago. What a long day - emotionally and physically. It's cold, though, wearing no shirt in a basement might do that to ya at 1:59 due to the lack of a sun being present. Oh Ra where are you when I need you? = o

sigh

My first family death. I handled it. And I think I'm handling it quite well. I'm not sure if my personal views, thoughts, etc on life and death have aided me with Dziadz's passing but I'd be willing to place a bet that it may have. I'm so happy that me mudda got to see him the night before he passed away and so was me mudda. She told me that he broke down crying twice telling her how proud he was of me. I couldn't hold back the tears. He was proud of me - my god that was comforting. He rarely said much but he was always asking about my friends and my life whether it was in NY, Japan, or lil ol CT.

I'm going to miss you Dziadz. I can feel the swell within my throat as I write your name. I'm going to miss you...

04-07-2005 02:20 am
- posted by garyploski @ 4/07/2005 02:20:00 AM