This weekend I found myself in a land known as - The Between.
It was Friday evening and I just wanted 10-15 minutes to myself so that I could Ultimate Fantastic Four and New Avengers. It was a most excellent two week pick=up at Legends. I saw a corner that was completely empty by the hot tub. Two chairs. A small table in between. Bingo!
Well, I thought I won until more and more people started stopping over to say hello. Many of these people I'd seen not 1 to 2 hours ago. Sigh. Others I barely knew, friend of Meg, and others were, well, others. I did my best to acknowledge and then move back into the story but I was defeated. I felt the loss so I gave in. It was inevitable. Alas.
Not too long after I gave in the storm clouds began to appear. The windows were open so I walked out to the loaner with both comics in hang. I found 5 minutes of solace in the last half of UFF, New Avengers would have to wait. On my way back in I realized something I'd briefly witnessed on the way outside. Meg and her friends were ALL in the living room playing cards or just... Sitting and talking. It was their task and they seemed to master it with little effort. The skills they have. Wow! = ) Passing through the hallway I made it into the kitchen area... It was filled with nearly all mothers preparing/making available the night's food. Um... Yea. I felt a bit uneasy and unsure with whom to speak to or hang out. Argh.
And so next, I was on the deck, ah. Here I was sure to find a place... to... wtf. The grand parents and a few random people were sitting and relaxing while fathers and the like were grouped in smatterings of groups chatting about the sixth corn fields insect problem. SERIOUSLY! = O
I kept walking and walking and walking until I made it to the end of the yard. I balanced myself on the rocks remembering how relaxing it was to just stand on a rock. From there I could see the whole party. It was going strong and I was completely outside of it. I was the only one of my generation wandering around a high school graduation party for 4 peeps. I was actually confused with what to do. Fortunately I wandered back toward the house to a tree where I felt my mind skipping backward to an old past-time - tree climbing. I looked up thought through the climb in my head thought "Should I?" The next thing I knew I had my legs wrapped over one branch and my hands supporting the rest of my weight. I was in a tree looking in on everything and everyone at the party. I was invisible and it felt great. Eventually Zack and Samantha (my little cousins) saw me in the tree with complete amazement in their faces. It disappeared as quickly as a good ice cream milk shake but it was a cute reaction.
I sat on the branch for a good 10 minutes thinking and clearing my head. This type of situation hasn't presented itself in so long. The difference with this time? I knew what was happening and WHY. To these facts I felt myself happy. Fitting in with my family is usually exceedingly simple though this time I needed some me time before I attempted the socializing. Eventually I made my way HIGHER up the tree and dumbfounded Zack and Sam. They couldn't believe that I was so high up. Such a peaceful place it was. Ahh.
Soon after seeing me the kids called me down, but not before I dropped leaves for them to catch. None were but it was fun to watch them hustle all around trying to catch one. = )
Everything changed when I had the chance to catch up with a cousin I hadn't seen in over a decade - Kurt. It's so much fun to share international stories especially when all the stories are from different countries in the same area of the world.
Brian finally showed up too, with Lauren. This pretty much wrapped up the eve since my peer was there to chat about politics, movies, etc. Yea BT!
Hmm, so the recognition of such a feeling, while GRReat!, I couldn't find much else to celebrate. I don't like finding myself in a foreigners spot with my FAM! Hrmm... Maybe next time I'll just sit with a group or maybe I'll just go for a drive. Nah. It was fun up in the tree. = D