The Return to & from PHL - Part II
A week ago I returned from PHL with smiles galore and excessive amount of happiness. This was all because of a vacation I took with my roomie to PHL. During the trip I happened to get a serious head cold. How? Why? Maybe I wasn't sleeping well? Maybe I got sick on the plane? Dunno why, but I know I was. At least a week plus later I'm almost free and clean of the sickness. A happy thought. = )
Another happy note was my vacation. Yes I was sick and yes I spent almost one full day in bed trying to get the cold out of me, and sure the weather was only in the 70's during the day and dropped WAY down in the evening. That really didn't matter. I was in PHL and I was with someone that I wanted to be with.
Upon arrival things weren't all to good because I spent the night in NYC the night before. This, well, this wasn't a desired choice on None's part. For me it wasn't a big deal, but as I just mentioned - my arrival in PHL didn't start off with a bang. Hell I wasn't even sickly yet.
We finally got through the evening and our time together began. What'd we do? We smiled lots, we danced lots, we Dizneed lots. We... lived out the week to it's fullest. The fullest I could live it that is. I was amazed at the brute strength of that head cold. I was popping pills BIG time. I am not a pill popper. No no no no NO, not a pill popper.
So the week carried forth with goodness abound until the last night. A message was read from my phone referring to how far I've come physically because of the gym and the fan was hit with the infamous shite. Dinner was ridiculous - our waiter showed up only to disappear for about 20 minutes. I left because I couldn't handle what was happening with None.
We finally had THE TALK we needed to have. Tears were shed and guards were let down. For me, everything became very clear. I knew how I felt, I knew what I wanted now and going forward. I let it all out. I let it ALL out.
Interestingly we came full circle to my arrival in PHL, emma became the focal point deciding whether or not our relationship would continue. At one point, a defining point for me, it was decided that it was over. I paused. I looked out the open door and then lifted my foot and slowly reached toward the door to lift myself up.
I was stopped. None didn't want to let me go. We spoke more and I finally asked something despite the fact that we're at opposite ends of the country. We both agreed that we wanted to try something we hadn't tried before. A commitment to each other. A no holds barred relationship. An official agreement to date exclusively.
This to me was unprecedented because the last time I uttered such words I was 21 years old. For those of you counting that's nearly 8 years ago. 7 years and about 9 months to be exact. Soon after we were smiling again and ready to face the evening together. Our last night in Diznee - dancing.
I met her friends and danced to music that was less than good. Repetitious rap/dance music that is played out on the radio. It was also SO HOT in the club that the regulars were complaining. I had a good time just being silly and letting myself go. I smiled.
The day of departure was, as I said, happy/sad etc. We knew how each other felt and the future was what lay ahead. It felt good. Again, I smiled. Avenga also smiled for me. It was a great trip to PHL and who knew what lay ahead. That's what we all wondered. Whatever it was didn't really matter to me. I was happy and I felt happy to be something (a boyfriend) and to have something (a girlfriend) I hadn't been in a long time. Heh.
04-06-2004 02:51 pm